Next Tattoo

So people...  I decided that it's time for a new tattoo.
The one I already have is around a year old soon, and I am dying to get a second one.
But the question is: what should it be?
I've already decided that it should be a Michael Jackson silhouette on my left lower arm. Underneath it I want the letters MJ and then the word Smile as it is Michael Jackson's favorite song, and whenever I will be sad I can look at it and remember that Michael would have wanted me to smile, not being sad.

So the big 1 million question is:
What silhouette should it be?

Here's a few to look at. My problem is that I love all of them. Help me out here, people, I count on your judgment :D

Long time, no see

I know, it's been a while since I showed my face here last.
I've been away on vacation, visiting some friends, doing weird, crazy and lazy stuff. Which has been nice, I've really needed that.
There isn't really much to tell.
I went to Copenhagen on July 9th to go to Nanna's birthday party. Dang she is lucky. She got a lot of nice stuff, but the best thing she got was a life-size card-board Michael Jackson stand-up. It's amazing. I just love it!

I mean look at him, he is just gorgeous! and it looks so realistic, even more when it's popped out of the background, so he stands by himself - I envy her so much..

Then I went to Christian and Inge's place, where I spent a great amount of time with hanging out with Joy, Christian and Inge, and Saturday Theo too..   it was really nice, I enjoyed it a lot. It had been way too long since I had seen Christian, and I had missed him so much, really, really much. But yeah, I had really missed all of them. It sucks living a zillion miles away from everybody I love.

Then Sunday I jumped on a bus from little Nærum to go to Albertslund where beautiful Laura was throwing a little get-together for a few girls. It was Laura, Stine, Sofie, Nina and I.
I loved it. It was so nice just hanging out, watching some MJ dvds, and just talking. About everything and nothing. It was just sad that Laura was going to Encino, CA at Thursday so from that day on I wouldn't see her for more than a month - unfortunately.
After girls night at Laura's I went back to Hvidovre with Stine. We just hung out, watch some TV show, and talked, and spent a few nights drinking. One night there was this amazing thunderstorm right above our heads so we ran out in the street in bare feet dancing around, acting crazy.
And then there was some drinking nights with a few crazyheads from her block, and mystery adventures with...  let's just say it was a boy.

After Stine's I went to Theo's birthday party at Saturday 17th. There was a lot of people I hadn't seen for ages, and it was so good to be back hanging out with them all. Even though it pissed me off that they kept on talking about the Stevie Wonder concert that I hadn't been able to go to.
After the party I came to Fowsia's place. And it was great, cause I rarely see her, and when I do it's not for more than a couple of hours a time, and I miss spending time with her. We spent the days going for walks, and laying on the grass watching clouds, talking about memories, and random stuff.
Then I was headed for Cille's place, whom I hadn't spent time with since...  since I don't know when.
We took a walk with her lovely dog, Luna, and then we watched a few movies. Old school: Scream 3, Scary Movie on VHS and Scary Movie 2 on VHS. We played a bit PS2, and other than that we just talked. I don't know when it was the last time that I had the chance to talk to Cille - just talk, so I really enjoyed that time, even though it weren't long we had together.
Then it became Tuesday and I was going for Nanna's place. We had a deal with Søren to meet with him, and then we would all take Nanna's 6year old brother to a playground near their house. It was awesome. There was this obstacle course that was called the Jungle Path. It was made for kids to learn the alphabet in a fun way, and I must say that I really enjoyed it a lot. There was no swings, but the carousel and the cableway really made up for it. I could stay there for hours - so we did.
At Wednesday Nanna and I went to Copenhagen to meet with Theo, and follow him to Jonas' place where we were staying till Saturday. We went to the beach, barbecued, made a bonfire where we roasted marshmallows and bread on a stick - don't really remember the English word for it - and we slept in a tent. We played dart and watched movies, and all in all it was actually pretty nice. The weather was good, and it was nice just sitting at the fire at night cuddling under a blanket watching the flames, talking about random stuff, drinking and just being together.

But something happened that hurt me deeply, and I had to went home Friday instead of Saturday - I just couldn't take it anymore. It tore out my soul, and now I am restless and don't know what to do.
I miss you. I wish I knew what to do.

Well, this was my 2 weeks on Sjælland. I hope everybody is having a nice vacation, and please take care of yourself out there. More accidents happen in the summer than people are aware of.

Love you all ♥

The Day You Slipped Away

Listening to: Broken by Seether

The Day You Slipped Away

I miss you
Miss you so bad
I won't forget you
Oh it's so sad

Is there some way that you can hear me?
I remember it clearly
The day you slipped away

I wish that I could see you again
I know that I can't
I wish you would be again
I know that there's no chance

Is there some way that you can hear me?
I remember it clearly
The day you slipped away

I had my wake up
Won't you wake up?
I keep asking why

My world is trembling
My body's numbing
The Oceans are running dry

And I can't take it
It wasn't fake
It happened
You passed by

Is there some way that you can hear me?
I remember it clearly
The day you slipped away

No matter how hard I try
I can't bring you back

Eating my heart out

I hate this day. Now I'm gonna have to face reality - I can't deal with it.
I think I'm going to break

I came here to make you dance tonight

So... I am sitting at Stine's floor with Cobra Starship's Guilty Pleasure (Album Version) in my brain, and I haven't been able to get it out since I heard it last afternoon. Not that it bothers me, but it's only two freaking lines.
Stine is fast asleep and I have been awake for around an hour and a half now, and I can't sleep anymore, so I thought that I'd just update this.

I don't know how I feel today. Kinda numb I guess. I got things straightened out with my friend yesterday. Which is good, cause I don't ever wanna lose him. I really love him, though he can be a jerk. But hey, who can't, am I right..
But I'm still feeling like I am gonna explode about that chick that annoys the crap outta me, and I can't really deal with the thought of seeing her tomorrow.

And then there's the case about tomorrow...   June 25th. The Black Day. The Date that's been eating my heart out for a year now.
I can't wrap my brain around it. It's just too much. It's killing me, and all the sudden it is just so real. It's like a nightmare where I'm running from a hideous clown but aren't getting anywhere and th freak is just coming closer and closer and no matter how much I tear my lungs out to scream, no sound is coming out.
It's just.. unbearable..

Yesterday I woke up from this amazing, just wonderful, dream that just seemed so real. It weren't anything big. We were just being together, spending time together. Talking, laughing, embracing each other - just Michael and me. It was so fantastic. And it was so real that when I woke up I could still feel the touch of his skin, smell the sweet scent of his hair, hear his humming in my ear. It killed me. I cried for half an hour when I realized what reality was.
And now I can't seem to stop thinking about it - about him. About the fact that I will never get the chance to hug him, to feel him, to look into those big brown eyes with the amazing lashes.

Michael Jackson, I miss you. Please come back to me?

call me a whiner - I don't freaking care

Listening to: Fall Out Boy 'Send Postcards From A Plane Crash (wish you were here)'

So, the last few days have been frustrating in so many ways.
I haven't talked to someone I considered one of my best friends in over a week, which is weird cause usually we talk every day all the time, but he wont return my phone calls or respond to my texts, and he haven't been online on Messenger that often, and when he has been he haven't contacted me at all. This made me worried about him, so Sunday night I sent him a text telling him that I was worried, not a sound in response. A few hours later he talked to me on Messenger as if nothing had happened, and I decided to let it be, and just take "the talk" about the past week later on cause I was kinda in the middle of something when he wrote me. But then all the sudden, out of the blue, he got all cold, and after a few cold responses he stopped replying.
I haven't contacted him since, cause I feel that this is his responsibility - it's him who have been ignoring me, and I can't keep up texting him or calling him to figure out what's going on with him.

Then there was a change of plans about this weekend, and the party there was meant to be a our friends' house is off, which gave me a few probs about places to stay, but Nikki and I got a deal with my friend Stine to crash at her place Friday. Then I was left with Saturday as a problem, so my Jonas asked if him and me could stay at this friend I thought was of my best friends' place. Jonas could, but there was no way that there was room for me there. That made me a little suspicious.
But now I just found out that a few of our other friends are staying there too. So now I'm seriously pissed at him. If I did something wrong he could at least have the decency to tell me!

And then there's this girl that I have been friends with for a bit more than half a year. Since November I guess. She's always had tiny things that have annoyed me, but I have put up with it, cause hey, we can't all like everything about each other.
But now it has just become too much. The more I think about it, the more I dislike her, and get annoyed by her. And I feel really bad about it, cause I don't think that she even realizes the things she does.
I just think that she is so self-centered and shallow and attention-desperate, and I just can't stand those kinda things.
She turns things that should be private and intimate and are actually really bad into some kind of circus to get attention, and it makes nauseated. I think it's sick and wrong those things that she does, and my honest opinion is that this girl needs some kind of help.
It is true though that she has been through a lot in her life, and that it must have been really tough for her and her family - but so have I, and I don't go around whining about it all the time just to get attention.
I hate her pity-crusade. It's wrong, it's sick and she needs help.

Normally when people gets on my last nerve I tell them, but how the Hell should I ever be able to tell her this?!
Everyone thinks that she is "soooo brave" and that she is "such a good person", so if I ever point this out to her she can tie them around her little finger in a second and I will end up losing a lot of people I really care about. I am starting to believe that that is what have happened with my (ex) best friend, cause he sees her as some kind of goddess that are unable to make mistakes, another thing that makes me wanna puke.

Many people might raise an eyebrow about this statement and think "hey, she's so obviously jealous", and trust me, I have gone that side of the story over and over again in my head. But no, it has nothing, whatsoever, to do with jealousy, cause she has nothing that I am interested in.
I am not interested in the kind of attention that she constantly seeks, I am not interested in being looked at as the "never-failing goodie goodie". No way, cause that is not me.
I just think that people are giving her attention on a false basis, and my respect for her sinks deeper and deeper every time I hear from her.

And I will end this now before my head explodes.
Thank you for putting up with my irrational, and extreme, garbage. All I know is that it really loosened up to get this out of my system cause I have been carrying it around for a long time now.
Let's just hope it doesn't escalate this Friday where I am forced to fake a smile for her.

Disco fever and Pirates Of The Caribbean

Sooo...   I just got home from house sitting my sisters apartment with my friend Elisa, and jesus, it was hilarious.

Friday we ran around the mall; me with a fake mustache, her with a children's viking helmet. People stared alot, and we got a few laughs from folks all around.
Then we went to the apartment where we ordered pizza, and played a looo-oooot of playstation - Pirates of the Caribbean. Dang are we some kick ass pirates!
Then we watched Cry Baby (Director's Cut) with the hottie Johnny Depp *drool* and after that we watched Eurotrip (Unrated Widescreen Edition) which is such a nice laugh!
Saturday we goofed with a little more playstation, and I must say that I am a pretty good Daredevil, and Elisa makes a nice Spiderman :D
Then we watched some Friends: Complete Fifth Season (4pc) (Std Sub), how can anyone NOT love this?
Later we made some crepes, and watched Road Trip (Unrated Edition). I can't believe Elisa hadn't seen those movies before. They're just epic!
Then we tuned in to the crabby music channels Denmark can come up with, turned up the volume, popped the Asti and Mokai and went crazy making wild 80's-like hair and make-up, and dressed up, goofing around, dancing around the apartment acting crazy. Singing along on the bad songs from the TV, and talking wildly about everybody we know (oh yeah, we did *OLE*).
Sunday we just chilled out, watching funny vids on youtube, and then we cleaned after ourselves as we listened to Tré Cool songs, and other weird stuff.

When I got home I got over ecstatic, cause I found that my Off the Wall [Vinyl] had arrived, and my Kurt Cobain: Journals too, so now I am just gonna read my ass of while listening to old records. Sweet Sunday, man..
When I got home the weather was nice, all sunny and warm, but after I had been home for around 30 minutes it started raining - no, not raining POURING! so I decided to put on my favorite Mr. Bean boxers and my Michael Jackson Ghosts t-shirt and dance around in the spontaneous summer rain, which was just amazing.
When I got inside the house again I was all soaked, and my t-shirt was clinging to my body like I had been pushed in the pool or something.

So...  this was my weekend. Now I just have to deal with my bad feelings about me not having been working out since Thursday :/

Sweat The Battle Before The Battle Sweats You

Sitting here listening to Sweat the Battle Before the Battle Sweats You (Album Version) from Cute Is What We Aim For, and I decided it was time for an update before leaving to make some dinner for my beloved father.
There still isn't any progress in my home-hunting in the big city, but I am planning to talk to my friend about her dorm and what she thinks about me applying for a room there asap.
Buuuuuut, this weekend I will be spending with Elisa (♥) being house-sitters for my sister and her bf. We planned to get drunk and have a marshmallow-contest - who can eat more marshmallows without vomiting. And we are going to watch Benny & Joon, and go Green Day nuts about Billie Joe's hairless arse :D

And then next week is coming. It's gonna be hard, tough. Extraordinary painful.
Tuesday will be awesome, spent with Jacque, and we are thinking about going to Eventyrhaven to just chill out.
Wednesday Jacque and I will meet up at Odense Station to go to Sjælland together. She's going to Fowsia's, I am going to Stine's. When I get to Stine's we are gonna get drunk, and Morten and I will be shooting her down with waterpistols and waterballons. THIS is gonna be great!
And then we are just gonna hang out till Friday - Friday is what is gonna kill me.
It's gonna be so mixed. I can't wait till I see everybody; Nikki, Theo, Nanna, Joy, Christian, Inge, JONAS, just everybody ... but June 25 is gonna be one of the worst dates in HIStory. I can't even get myself to think about the pain that is gonna inflict all of the City Square of Copenhagen on that date. So many tears, so much love, so much pain, so much frustrations..  It's gonna be straight-downwards Hell.

But let's just make the best of it; if we can.

Peace out, folks

The Beach

Maybe if I keep standing here 

Some day I will sink deep enough in 

So that only the sea will notice me

The stream will take away my pain

And the fish will be my only company

The rocks will keep me earthbound

And the seaweed will keep me warm

I will kiss the starfish

I wish I could just sink into the sand

Listening to: Little Susie / Pie Jesu 

by Michael Jackson

That most annoying feeling...

It's been two amazing days with Theo and Julie at my place..
but now I feel empty, and my house feels empty, and it's making me depressed as hell..

I miss Theo to cuddle with, and to curl into a ball while holding his hand, and my head on his shoulder. It's not fair to have this damn distance between us - the world is just mean.

I don't know how I feel right now.
I think I've pushed my feelings for him (not Theo) away - and yet again I am not sure.
But I don't know. It feels like I've got an emptiness inside - I can't seem to get rid off it.
If I don't feel like that about him anymore, who should I dream of instead? If I don't feel like that about him anymore, who am I going to fall for, that I am really not supposed to fall for?
........one thing I do know is; this is a huge mess..

A Box Full of Love

So ... the mail just arrived, and it was filled with happiness.
The first i opened was the cardboard shaped like an old fashioned record - oh yeah, a vinyl LP. i already knew what it would be, but I was thrilled to open it and see that it was in such an amazing state.
My new Michael Jackson;  Music And Me vinyl record, old-school style:

Such a beauty - I love it :'DD

and then I baked a few chocolate-chip muffins - because I was bored ...

and here it is..  the inside of my box filled with love (and gold pants) from Fowsia. It's amazing - a book filled with pictures of Michael and her and me with friends, doing Michael'ish stuff, a pack of MJ badges, a postcard with a beautiful black/white photo of MJ on it, two toffees, and for those who can't see it, a little plastic-bag with Skittles - my favorite candy of all times.

Thank you, honey - I love you so much.<3

____________________________________________________

And now I have to leave you, cause I have to find a bus so I can go and pick up Theo and Julie in Odense, so we can go to my place and act all goofy and crazeeeeeeey..

Happy Halloween ya all...    -or maybe not :'DD

happy sunshine then, love you folks ..

Peace, and keep the faith

*tears*

I sat looking at photos, thinking about old times, and then it hit me like a truck:
JESUS how I miss the Faroe Islands..   like really, really bad..
It's been almost a year since I was up there, but it feels like a lifetime. It was the most beautiful thing in the world, and I wish that I could re-live it, again, and again, and again ...
It's one of those places that you will never forget, and will always seek back to.
I know I will, if I ever get the chance ...

Everything was just so beautiful, and the air filled my lungs in a way that I have never felt oxygen before. Even the water was so delicious that I didn't wanted to drink anything else ever again.

And I finally got to my mission - to kiss a sheep!

I promised a friend to kiss a sheep while I was there, so I did. It's only a statue, but hey it's a statue of a sheep :'DD

And also ... we went to the furthest point of FO - Tinganes.

We went out and look at the water and saw our flowers being caught by the water streams, in memory of our beloved Michael Jackson. I will never forget this moment. 

I love you, Mike ♥ 

And I will  never forget FO. I so desperatly wish that I will ever be able to go back there. It was truly one of the high lights of my life. Can't wait till I see you all again.

This is my life....

So ...  my day has been as following;
woke up around 10, stayed in bed till around 10.30, just enjoying the warmth of the sun in my face.
Then I got up, and scrambled around the kitchen to find myself some breakfast. Then I sat and talked to my dad, when all the sudden I remembered I had a bus to catch.
Then I met my mom, and gave her the paint for my grandpa. Then she drove me down to the gym, and I spent around an hour on working out.(GORGEOUS girl in the dressing room, and all the sudden her amazing breasts were in my face, me just begging to God not to let this be a dream *dies*)
After that I went to shop some fruit for my little get-together-thing tomorrow, where two of my friends are coming over. I found a bag of 200 waterballons - which, of course, I just had to own! and a package of oil crayons, that I had been looking for for around a million years - creativity here I come :D
And then I had to run to catch the bus, but I made it. Then I called my piercer to ask him what my planned new piercing is gonna cost, and he told me that he doesn't even make those, because of the infections it can cause. Well, that was a huge bummer - now I have to decide if I want it anyway, and just take real good care of it, or not - dammit!
Then I got home, and realized that I had forgot to buy strawberries, miv...  

But now I am just talking to Theo and Jonas (arhww *dies* dammit hating love) on MSN, and should actually be going to my room and vacuum it all  .___.

Let's see how that works out, wish me luck, folks...

Peace, and keep the faith, all of you creepers out there.

Lyrics Of The Day: Will you Be There?

I am just gonna take a few seconds to post a picture of the man I love more than I can tell. You're beautiful.

In our darkest hour 

In my deepest despair

Will you still care?

Will you be there?

In my trials, and my tribulations

Through our doubts, and frustrations

In my violence, in my turbulence

Through my fear, and my confessions

In my anguish and my pain

Through my joy and my sorrow

In the promise of another tomorrow

I'll never let you part

For you're always in my heart

Artist: Michael Jackson

Year: 1991

Album: Dangerous 

Youtube: Will You Be There?

I Don't Believe You

I Don't Believe You

I don't believe you
You can't have left me
You wouldn't
Ever
I don't believe you

It's like one of those bad dreams
When you can't wake up
Like screaming with no sound
Like crying without tears
Like hurting with no bruise

I don't believe you
You couldn't have left me
You wouldn't
Ever

It's like tearing out my heart
But not dying
Like running but not getting anywhere
Like laughing but not being happy
Like reaching out but not being able to reach

I don't believe you
You couldn't have left me
You wouldn't
Ever

It's like kids too scared to play
Like a night without stars
Like summer without sun
Like thunder without storm

I don't believe you
You couldn't have left me
You wouldn't

Would you?

Michael Jackson, I love you

Prejudice is Ignorance

I was sitting watching Michael Jackson's Black Or White video, so I decided to make a picture...   because he's right, and I was bored, (and was looking for an excuse to not clean my room right away,) and here's what I got to

Lyrics Of The Day: Ghosts

Who gave you the right to shame my family?

And gave you the right to scare my baby? she needs me
And who gave you the right to shake my fablic tree?

You put a knife in my back

Shot an arrow in me!

Tell me are you the ghost of jealousy?

A sucking ghost of jealousy!

Artist: Michael Jackson
Year: 1995
Album: Blood On The Dance Floor
Youtube: Ghosts Music Video

we are the waiting

Just sitting here listening to Green Day Are We The Waiting/St. Jimmy, and just thought that I would throw something out here before leaving to be all family-social with fake smiles and nice clothing. Yup, story of my life...
Earlier this day I was talking to a friend on MSN, cause yeah, that's where I live my life during normal days, and it occured to me that even though he and I have only spent a few hours together just him and me, he is one of the friends that I have that I haven't know for a long time that knows me the best.
It was kinda scary to think about, cause usually it takes people years and years to get under my skin, to really get to know me. But not him, not this kid, he just got to me.
He's a lot younger than me, and it shows sometimes, but I really don't think about it, cause I feel comfortable around him. I feel comfortable about telling him my thoughts, my secrets, letting him know my life - aspects of my life that I'm not even sure my best friend knows about.
It scares me. It really does. It scares me that I can be so vulnerable to a person that I haven't known for more than a few months - and it's a boy, a guy, a man, he's XY-chromosed - and those are the one that frigthens me to death.
And now I just sit wondering; how the hell did he get to me? what's with this boy?
I can only say one thing - I love him, I hope I'm not scare him off, he means alot to me.

Yeah, there might be alot more here about him, crazy talk or something like that..
afterall...  crazy talk is what I do best.
Now I will hear In The Closet (oh yum, Michael Jackson moaning *dies*) and then I will leave to be superficial and nice to people that doesn't like me.
See ya out there, bloggers, stalkers, and other airheads.

Peace, and keep the faith

to ride a giraffe..........

So..  this is my blog.
For the first time on blogspot ever...

But now I sit wondering...  what should I be blogging about?
My head is kind of a big mess at the moment..       and the crazy thing is, that even though there really is a loooot of stuff going on in my head, I can't seem to find the words to tell what it is.
Oh yeah..   family, friends, distances between my friends and I, job (crabby boss), and yes, of course...   A BOY!
I can't seem to get this boy out of my mind! It's so freaked cause I already know that he doesn't feel the same way, and yet it feels like it keeps getting more and more intense what I am feeling. It freaks me out..
He's one of my best friends, and luckily for me nothing has changed between us since I told him about my feelings - which only made my feelings grow, cause it makes him even more *dysh*

Uh! but hey, there's a sunshine at the other side of the rainy skies..   next weekend I am going clubbing with a friend that I haven't really spent much time with 101, so it's gonna be awesome..  our plan is to dress up all 80'like and then go dance at bars. Then Saturday we're gonna hang with a friend and we're gonna go all Michael Jackson crazy, and watch dvds, listening to old records and just talk about his greats and jokes, and check out my collection of MJ-stuff..
I've never had MJ-fans at my place before so it's gonna be weird...   but nice..

So, I have no idea what more to write, and I feel like I'm just blabbing away about nothing so I am not gonna take up more of anyone's time..  *cloudybrains*
Nighty night for now, folks *hugging all around*

Peace out, and keep the faith
Love